My Father - It was all for us

A child of a school teacher

Well respected in time

Tainted by war and colonialism

Normalcy amounted to death

Following orders

Missed friends.

Doing what was right

It was all for us.

Dreams and aspirations clouded

Hope of a new day

A massive movement to become

Idealized partners with unfailing plans

Victory in reach

What did it become...

Grief.

But it was all for us.

Charcoal nights

And calm waters

A life was in its cocoon

Yet escape was the only way.

Or death

Or Insanity.

But it was all for us.

Fear of being caught

Holes to sink a ship

A blessing in disguise

At the expense of a lost child.

But it was all for us.

A few years later

Barely enough to make it through

The children didn't know any better.

Happiness only surrounded with laughter.

It was all for us.

Work hard

Respect the elders

And I will feed and provide whatever is necessary.

Not knowing what poor was.

Because everything was all for us.

As I cried each night

Wondering why my Father was so mean

Why he was unlike the other affectionate dads

Why nothing I did ever seemed good enough

I didn't know that everything he did was all for us.

And with years

Frailty was in sight

Lessons of life came back

As I cried in his brittle arms

Of the only lost I've ever known.

He looked at me with affection

And told me that this was all for me.

And all for us.

He gave me education, so I could compete.

He gave me grief, so I can be stronger.

He gave me music, so I can breathe.

He gave me what was needed not wanted, so I could appreciate the beauty of life.

He let me go, so I could grow my wings.

This was him giving what he knew.

So when the time came, I was ready.

Because in the end, it was all for us.

My Inspiration

This morning as I was driving down 1960 in Humble, Texas, I noticed a family owned taco stand that was very well maintained. Outside, underneath a covered tent, white lawn chairs that were strategically placed was taken by a family - mother, father, grandparents, and young children. It got me thinking, who are these people, and are they related to the owners of the taco stand? Why are they here? Is this a weekly morning breakfast joint? Or did they feel like coming here on this particular day because the weather was so nice...? And of course...what's their story? How did this stand come to be in its existence?

And as I kept driving with my Jay-Z album blaring, the same question kept ringing in my thoughts...what's their story.

Let me explain myself, my experience in college, although not too long ago, played an enormous part with my curiousity of life. My curiousity of why people are the way they are, and the stories that make them them... Why certain people live their life the way they do, why some are superficial and materialistic to the reason why people are driven to change their world.

It's the stories that make their reality and the way they see themselves in this life and existence.

With each story that I discover so far in my young life (again this is relative as to what you consider young), it helps me see people in a 3-dimensional realm, helps me understand, and even appreciate what life is. And sometimes when you understand where folks are coming from, it makes the world a bit more meaningful and conceiveable.

So as I make this my journey to see and witness lives, I hope that I can also share it with the world. I'm not quite sure where I will go with this blog, but I hope that through this, I can continue learning and growing, and take back with me the stories that really connect each and everyone of us. I'm hoping that this can be as real as possible with little fluffs, and perhaps some funny and heartfelt moments.

Please bear with me, I'm not a professional writer, I'm just a young lady still curious about life and interested in hearing the stories that goes beyond our own scope.

The easiest to start of will be with my parents. I'll have a post up about them, especially my Father. I conducted an oral history a few years ago, and I think now would be the perfect time to share...

I went home last week and my Mom pulled me to the side and gave me two pictures of my Father and me, and told me that she thought I should keep these... (my Dad holding me, and my 7th Grade Award Ceremony, and yes folks, that's me picking my nose).